In the last two weeks, I’ve taken a really long look at everything that has gone well and in my favor whether planned for or a true surprise. I took into account the state of mind that I’ve tried to stay in. And ultimately I’ve really taken stock of who I have been emulating, following and using as a baseline for being a good man. As the long term impact of who I am by word and action and the effects that I will have on my child sets in deep, I’m forced to face the man in the mirror through a different lens.

I have been in constant daily prayer over matters concerning my family unit, Team Joseph. My concerns however have remained largely provincial. We needed a new vehicle after our last one spontaneously combusted. So prayed for, so received. We definitely needed a larger home and we found a great place. As we rethought our needs we continued to pray for eventually found the perfect place. Everything that we have needed and prayed for, we have gotten. And here’s why. My queen only trusts and follows me in faith because I trust and follow God in faith. It’s really and truly just that simple. Every man is being led by someone or something. For some men it may be money, power or respect (Peace to The L.O.X.). For others it may be women, drugs, athletic prowess or social status. Please dont mistake these for things that a man may be driven by, the reference is to these things being in place of God.

My father is a great example of a man and taught me many great things about being a loving, dedicated and genuine man through example. As a human, he made good and poor choices as we all have. But he comes second to the greatest example of being loving, dedicated and genuine. That example is God. Everything good about me as a man is a result of what God pulled out of me through the covering of my father. So when I sit and pray, preparing for the task of being a covering to my queen and child, its to God I turn, trust and toil. Like my father, im not perfect. Ive made great and devastating decisions however just like my father, I grew from all of them and am a better man for it.

As a father to be it is a scary burden to bear of being the spiritual rock of your family. Believing in God in the middle of the storm is not easy. Being a black man looking to raise up a family in this day and age is a frightful task. One could count all of the polls, issues, stats and percieved roadblocks that send a good number of brothers down “Baby Daddy Road”. No responsibility, all cowardice if you ask me. Just knowing that my queen is looking to me for security and peace draws me closer to God to find the path he wishes for me follow day by day. It’s my prayer that more black men recognize the worth and value of being fully engaged, present and accounted for.

Its not going to be easy. You will be stressed to your breaking point. You will want to get away and think. You will cry and you will yell. But you will fail if you’re being led by anything or anyone other than God, and this includes your spouse/girlfriend. If you let go of yourself and allow God to lead you, success and blessings beyond measure shall be yours. Letting God lead you my man, thats what being a man really and truly is.

“I came to overcome before I’m gone By showin and provin and lettin knowledge be born Then after that I’ll live forever – you disagree? You say never? Then follow me!” – Rakim




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